>Q:  What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
>  A:  45 lbs.
>  
>  Q:  What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
>  A:  45 minutes.
>  
>  Q:  What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman?
>  A:  Sexual harassment.
>  
>  Q:  What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
>  A:  $3.99 a minute.
>  
>  Q:  What is the definition of "making love"?
>  A:  Something a woman does while a guy is screwing her.
>  
>  Q:  Did you hear about the new blonde paint?
>  A:  It's not real bright, but it's cheap, and spreads easy.
>  
>  Q:  How can you tell if your wife is dead?
>  A:  The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
>  
>  Q:  How can you tell if your husband is dead?
>  A:  The sex is the same but you get the remote.
>  
>  Q:  What's the difference between Pee-wee Herman and O.J.?
>  A:  It took 12 jerks to get O.J. off.
>  
>  Q:  How do we know God is a man?
>  A:  Because if God were a woman, sperm would taste like chocolate.
>  
>  Q:  What would you call a lesbian with thick fingers?
>  A:  Well-hung.
>  
>  Q:  What's another term for lesbian?
>  A:  "Vagitarian."
>  
>  Q:  Why did cavemen pull their women around by the hair?
>  A:  Because if they pulled them around by their feet, they'd fill up
>      with mud.
>  
>  Q:  If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
>  A:  The swallow.
>  
>  Q:  What does a Polish woman do after she sucks a cock?
>  A:  Spits out the feathers.
>  
>  Q:  What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
>  A:  Humpme Dumpme. >>
>=============================================================
>
> Give Me Breasts
> 
> A flat-chested woman walks into an antique store. She spots a 
> rather unique, old mirror, with a $5000.00 price tag on it.  She 
> asks the shopkeeper about the mirror.  He tells her it is one of 
> a kind, with special powers.  He tells her it grants wishes.  She 
> is so excited, she whips out her checkbook, and writes a check 
> for the full amount.  When she gets it home, she hangs it up and 
> says "Mirror, Mirror on the door.  Make my chest a 44!"
> 
> The next thing she knows, her breasts are growing in size, 
> literally busting out of her blouse.  She is astonished!  Later 
> her husband comes home, and is amazed to find his buxom wife. She 
> tells him all about the mirror.  He doesn't believe it.  He 
> stands in front of the mirror and says "Mirror, Mirror on the 
> door.  Make my cock touch the floor!"