DEAR ABBY

I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one
night he came home sober.

I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted
him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen
again.

My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50 an hour every week
for two-and-a-half years.  He must be crazy.

I have a man I never could trust.  Why, he cheats so much I'm not even sure
this baby I'm carrying is his.

I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two
years.  It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the
cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

A couple of women moved in across the hall from me.  One is a middle-aged gym
teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties.  These two
women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into their
apartment or come out.  Do you think they could be Lebanese?

My mother is mean and short-tempered. I think she is going through her mental
pause.

I met this nice guy who was in the service. He's the chief petting officer.

Dear ABBY: Are birth control pills deductible?  KAY
Dear KAY: Only if they don't work.

Dear ABBY: I know boys will be boys, but my 'boy' is seventy-three and he's
still chasing women. Any suggestions?  ANNIE
Dear ANNIE: Don't worry. My dog has been chasing cars for years, but if he
ever caught one, he wouldn't know what to do with it.

Dear ABBY: Do you think it would be all right if I gave my doctor a little
gift?  I tried for years to get pregnant and couldn't and he finally did it.

Dear ABBY: Our son was married in January. Five months later his wife had a
ten-pound baby girl. They said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby
this big be that early?  WONDERING
Dear WONDERING: The baby was on time, the wedding was late.  Forget it.

Dear ABBY: Do you think about dying much?  CURIOUS
Dear CURIOUS: No, it's the last thing I want to do.

Dear ABBY: Is it possible for a man to be in love with two women at the same
time?  JAKE
Dear JAKE: Yes, and also hazardous.

Dear ABBY: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't
afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Any suggestions?  SAM IN CAL.
Dear SAM: Yes. Run for public office.

Dear ABBY: What inspires you most to write?  TED
Dear TED: The Bureau of Internal Revenue.

Dear ABBY: I am forty-four years old and I would like to meet a man my age
with no bad habits.  ROSE
Dear ROSE: So would I.

Dear ABBY: What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?  BESS
Dear BESS: Night and day.