This is the saddest list I have sent out yet. However, I am sure there
will be more.

Brian Murphy
San Diego, CA

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Q. Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a greyhound?
A. Greyhound waits for the hare to show.

++++++++++++++++

A redneck goes to Germany because he wants to drive on the Autobahn.
On the radio he hears:
"Motorists on the autobahn be careful, a car is driving on the wrong
side of the road." 
 The redneck says; "ONE!?!"  "There's Hundreds".

++++++++++++++++

So this guy wants to go into a nightclub, but the bouncer says, 
"Sorry, bud, you need a tie for this place." 

Our Hero goes back  to his car and rummages around, but 
there's no necktie to be found. Finally, in desperation, he takes 
his jumper cables,  wraps them around his neck, ties a nice 
knot, and lets the ends dangle free. 

Back to the nightclub, where the bouncer says "Well, OK, I 
guess you can come in. But don't start anything."