Hi All:
     
As you know, we are always trying to improve the efficiency of our 
processes.  Toward this end, we have invented the following form 
letter which should help to expidite the review process:  
     
 
Dear:    [ ]  Sir              [ ]  Exalted One
         [ ]  Madam            [ ]  Twit
         [ ]  Business Unit    [ ]  Simpleton 
         [ ]  Boss             [ ]  Dweeb
         [ ]  Idiot            [ ]  Pompous Fool
     
     
You are being   [ ]  Complimented  [ ]  Praised
                [ ]  Knighted      [ ]  Berated
                [ ]  Shredded      [ ]  Disembowled
                [ ]  Left in peace [ ]  Publicly Humiliated 
                [ ]  Hoisted by thy own petard
     
because you [ ]  Followed the Rules  [ ]  Did a great job
            [ ]  Didn't screw up     [ ]  Weren't being careful 
            [ ]  Defied us           [ ]  Acted like a dufus
            [ ]  Gave new meaning to the term "vogon" 
            [ ]  Put your foot in your mouth in front of your boss
     
Consequently, your [ ]  pages  [ ] suggestion
                   [ ]  hopes of promotion
     
is/are being [ ]  considered  
             [ ]  sent to CGIN for immiediate installation 
             [ ]  further reviewed
             [ ]  " mv * /dev/null"'d
             [ ]  " rm *"'d
             [ ]  Moved to our dying hard drive
             [ ]  Forgotten
     
Thank you [ ] for putting up with us
          [ ] for your patience
          [ ] for not visiting Santa Monica
          [ ] for your excellent efforts
          [ ] for your message