Men's Life Styles As They Age

     AGE        DRINK

     17         beer
     25         beer
     35         vodka
     48         double vodka
     66         Maalox

                SEDUCTION LINE

     17         My parents are away for the weekend. 
     25         My girlfriend is away for the weekend. 
     35         My fiancee is away for the weekend. 
     48         My wife is away for the weekend.
     66         My second wife is dead. 

                FAVORITE SPORT

     17         sex
     25         sex
     35         sex
     48         sex
     66         napping

                DRUG

     17         pot
     25         coke
     35         really good coke
     48         power
     66         coke, a limousine, the company jet 

                DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE 

     17         "tongue"
     25         "breakfast"
     35         "She didn't set back my therapy." 
     48         "I didn't bump into her kids." 
     66         "Got home alive."

                FAVORITE FANTASY

     17         getting to third
     25         airplane sex
     35         menage a trois
     48         taking his company public 
     66         Swiss maid/Nazi love slave 

                HOUSE PET

     17         roaches
     25         stoned-out college roommate 
     35         Irish setter
     48         children from his first marriage 
     66         Barbi

                WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED? 

     17         25
     25         35
     35         48
     48         66
     66         17

                IDEAL DATE

     17         Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in
     25         "Split the check before we go back to my place" 
     35         "Just come over."
     48         "Just come over and cook."
     66         sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas to see Frank